As we all know e-mail has become our most effective way of communication. Lets look at how we have evolved our communication process and what affect it has on your business.
Caveman Communication
When people lived in caves their communication might not have consisted of much more than grunts, gestures and facial expressions, but they had to have some ways of expressing such messages as: “I’m not intending to beat you, and I hope you feel the same” or “You take that side of the mammoth and I’ll take this side and let’s hope we get him before he gets us.” Today’s interrelations are more complex, and so are the messages, but the co-existence remains. Communication and interpersonal relations are in fact entwined.
There are many types of communications, the two most common are tough and smell. Neither do we have in our email communications.
Nonverbal Communication Speaks Volumes
Let’s take a look at cultural and nonverbal communication and why the interpretation of non-verbal messages is influenced by culture and is especially important in business.
A few examples:
Tom leaves his home at 8:30 am and stops at the local Starbucks for coffee. Before he can speak, the counter person says, “The usual?” Tom nods yes. While he savors his coffee and reads the paper, a heavy man pushes onto the adjoining stool and overflows his space. Tom grimaces and the man pulls himself in as much as he can. Tom has sent two messages without speaking a word.
One, the man has invaded his space, and secondly maybe Tom has an issue with his size. Whether Tom really has an issue with his size doesn’t matter - the two have already been portrayed non-verbally!
Phil is talking to Rich’s wife at a party. Their conversation is entirely trivial, yet Rich observes them suspiciously. Their physical proximity and the movements of their eyes reveal that they are powerfully attracted to each other.
Jose Ybarra and Sir Edmund are at the same party and it is important for them to establish a cordial relationship for business reasons. Each is trying to be warm and friendly, yet they will part with mutual distrust and their business transaction will probably go a muck. Jose, in Latin fashion, moved closer and closer to Sir Edmund as they spoke and this movement was misinterpreted as pushiness to Sir Edmund, who kept backing away from this intimacy. Backing away then communicated to Jose coldness. The silent languages of Latin & English cultures are more difficult to learn.
In these examples you see powerful messages communicated with out words. Non-verbal communication is communication with out words. You can communicate non-verbally when you gesture, smile, frown, widen your eyes, move your chair closer to someone or say nothing. These non-verbal messages interact with verbal messages, thus creating confusion. Analyze your own non-verbal communication patterns.
Now that we understand how important non-verbal communication can be lets look at how detrimental it could be to stereotype a person, company or product.
“Stereotypes pose especially powerful barriers in intercultural communication. The reason is simple: Our stereotypes of groups to which we do not belong, for example, race, national or religious groups, gender are likely to be more inaccurate and negative than the stereotypes of the groups to which we ourselves belong.” (Gudykunst, 1991, Bridging Differences: Effective Intergroup Communication.)
This ALL changes DRASTICALLY when utilizing the Internet. In using websites & e-mail addresses you have no verbal or non-verbal communication, what you have is written. You have no signs of sex, age, race, or religion this does eliminate most areas of stereotyping.
However, make no mistake you are communicating non-verbal, non-written messages in your e-mail. You must learn how to communicate properly, how to express emotions non-verbally.
The use of the Internet is a huge resource for marketing and communicating in many industries as well as the mortgage industry. It can limit some risk of miscommunication. In using e-mail it gives the sender the opportunity to correct and rewrite any portion of the message that may not be communicated well. It also gives you the disguise as to whether male or female is the sender, your age is unknown. If you should have a physical disability it is unknown, the email as well as a website are judged by looks and content. It is a virtual hidden identity thus creating a level playing marketing field for almost everyone.
This is why it is so important to capture your market with your website’s appearance and content immediately. IT IS YOU! It may all anyone ever sees or knows about you. You have 10 seconds or less to make your best First impression! Make it count. This is especially true of websites. You must snarl them kin and hold their attention or they will surf on by you…
In writing e-mails, it is also important to create the best first impression. Turn on your spell check and grammar: don’t send imperfect email. We all make mistakes in typing but the Internet allows us to appear flawless with the tools we have access to.
I will share a story with you. I was dealing with some clients on a residential loan. We had some serious issues relating to their current job status. The Realtor I was working with didn’t care what the issues were I had, even though they were legitimately red flags and serious problems. All she saw in her eyes was her commission check going down the tubes…well in my haste of writing emails back and forth to the account rep and the attorney who by the way was related to the attorney…I inadvertently sent an email that I thought was going to the account rep and I said, This Realtor is nuts! She doesn’t care…. And I sent it to the attorney by mistake…needless to say she was not very happy with me and pointed out how it was an “Unprofessional thing to do, I agreed whole heartedly, and ate crow…” and in the end she (the attorney) let up a bit, knowing how strong armed she could be … However with the click of the mouse we can do a lot of damage. So I said this story only to point out to be careful especially in the heat of an issue when emails are flying back and forth!
Let’s talk about the salutation line. This is where you need to capture your prospects attention or inform whom ever you writing to what your message is about…. No tricks, honesty… It may determine is someone opens, reads or deletes your message. Be straightforward, short and intriguing. Wow, all that in a few words. Communication skills are a must in today’s market.
It is conquering the art of persuasion, mystique, and honesty all through written communication. Make no mistake non-verbal communication is at play! The way you present your message, your punctuation, your language usage will all play a huge factor in how your message is interpreted. Look at the following examples:
In communicating:
Confidence: well thought out, concise and well written. “My friend just showed me a new product, that I loved. It really works great.
Fear: hee-haw around, indirect, lacking self-confidence. “My friend introduced me to a product, I’m not sure if I liked it, or if it’s for me.
Excitement: Bold print, punctuation, and exclamation marks. “My friend just showed me a new product, that I LOVED! It really works terrific!
Anger/Indifference: Short, snippy lines could display indifference; bold letters could give the appearance of anger depending on usage. “MY FRIEND SHOWED ME A NEW PRODUCT, I tried it, it was REALLY, REALLY HORRIBLE!
When penning our email messages whether to a friend or a business colleague proper communication etiquette is always important. Take the time to review your message and make sure you are sending the correct impression as well as message.